Marshal Kim Jong-Un disrupts international conference of musicologists, with surprising new theory

Musical theorem of Marshal Kim Jong-Un is peer-reviewed.
Results will be published momentarily.
Publication of theory begins:
Musical theorem of Marshal Kim Jong-Un is this:
(Foreign media sources must credit DPRK News Service.)
Musical theorem of Marshal Kim Jong-Un is that most western “hit” “rock” “music” is stolen from songs of peasants and disfavored minorities. [Thread Reader]

Original Twitter Thread The comments are interesting.

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There is something very, very wrong with today’s music. It just may not be very good.

On warm summer nights, the park across the street from my house is filled with people playing dribbling soccer balls, playing volleyball, or engaging in aggressive games of Spikeball.

Nearly all of them will have music playing through Bluetooth speakers, usually from the Spotify Top 100. And if I’m honest, none of this music is any good. All I hear is mumbled lyrics tunelessly rendered (well, except for the overuse of Auto-Tune) and beats so quantized that they could be substituted for an atomic clock.

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