Dumb People In St. Louis Keep Getting Gored Because They Take SELFIES WITH ELK

Think of it as natural selection in action.

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  • Jay Currie

    Where we lived on Central Vancouver Island there were a lot of elk. Nice animals until rutting season. Then, stay away.

    Here’s the back yard at sunup

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/4602eb227b4a35b9042c138be3c8f0bd15d5c2df653238a5bd2cd03348a6a45b.jpg

    • Maurice Miner

      Jay, that’s something that I will never see in my own backyard! Excellent!

    • Maggat

      Nice picture. I’ve never had elk like that at my place, but herds of those damn deer.

    • What attracted them to your backyard?

    • Jay Harper

      Yes, they can get quite aggressive. Even those stupid toy deer we have can be a danger.

    • Watchman

      Wait – your yard is full of…Moose limbs! Four to every native elk! Allahu Akbar!

  • Maurice Miner

    Look, if all the warning signs were in ENGLISH, such as:

    “Park managers have posted signs warning people not to approach the
    elk. Specifically, the signs say: “Absolutely do not approach the elk!”

    Other signs warn people to stay at least 100 feet from the elk.

    Still other signs say: “Elk mating season: Use extra caution.”

    Exactly none of these signs appear to have had any impact on the two women who got gored.”

    This is totally discriminatory against those whose first language ISN’T English. I think that the failure to place multi-dialectic warnings is going to open a whole new slew of litigation, and rightfully so!

    • DaninVan

      Maurice; there is ONE official language in the US. Period. If you can’t understand it then best have a guide or translator.
      I’ve had a close encounter with Roosevelt Elk here on the BC West Coast.Trust me I didn’t go looking for them, they found me.
      They are very large animals… with antlers…and razor sharp hooves.
      I didn’t need a sign to tell me I was trespassing on THEIR turf.

      • Jay Currie

        DaninVan, so…I was lying in my hammock and had, well, drifted off. I heard a noise behind me but it sounded like the kids down the hill and I went back to sleep. About an hour later my older son and my foofy golden doodle arrived at the top of the hill. The dog started barking bigly.

        “Er, Dad,” said my son twenty five feet up the hill, “Look behind you.”

        I did and there, enjoying the coolness of the grove, was a six point bull elk as asleep as I had been, about four feet behind me. Majestic and all. I flipped off the hammock to the downhill side and crept, very carefully, down a small cliff to relative safety. Sure, it was July, but those things are the size of horse and have huge bloody antlers.

        Good times!

        • You should have gotten a selfie!

          • Jay Currie

            Absolutely my first priority…didn’t have my phone…Damn.

      • I don’t think it is necessary to have any language other than common sense. Elk, bears, mountain lions cannot be pet.

    • Lightstream

      I hope you’re being facetious.

    • Maurice Miner

      God’s sake, dudes, chill out! I refuse to use an /s tag, because that is utterly demeaning to readers.

      If a reader cannot identify obvious sarcasm, then the Western World is lost.

      • DaninVan

        OK: but really, Maurice, there’s so much weird shit happening that satire gets drowned out by reality.
        ‘Fake news’ is a perfect example.

        • Maurice Miner

          Yes, the Western World is indeed lost…
          There is a lot of weird shit going on, I wholeheartedly concur.

    • Blacksmith

      If those Elk had done their job and Darwined those two we wouldn’t be having these lawsuits, I say we sue the elk for dereliction of duty……….

  • Maggat

    Natural selection at work and she wasn’t his choice, but instead, a threat.

  • tom_billesley
  • Hard Little Machine

    When I was 11 I watched someone in Yellowstone park try to put their own child on the back of a bear to take a picture.

    • Exile1981

      I saw someone try and get their kid to pet the buffalo in yellowstone.

  • Reader

    These people all think of themselves as environmentalists, so they’re already used to being Al-Gored.

  • QiPo

    Doing the work Republicrats don’t, can’t, or won’t do: Social Darwinism on da’ Hoof Award!

  • Life is not a Disney cartoon.