Top Syrian rebel leader Zahran Alloush ‘killed in air strike near Damascus’

A prominent rebel leader was killed in an air strike near the Syrian capital on Friday, a monitoring group and rebel sources said, in what was seen as a major blow to the opposition fighting to wrest control of the country from the government.

Zahran Alloush, the head of the powerful Islamist faction Jaysh al-Islam (Islam Army), was reported to have been killed when warplanes fired missiles at the headquarters of one of the group’s headquarters in Al-Marj area in the rebel-held eastern Ghouta region.

  • simus1

    Was Santa spotted flying in the vicinity?

  • Jon Sobieski

    Good. Al Baghdadi, you’re next.

    • Justin St.Denis

      Dip him in porkfat, skewer him like a pig, and roast him over an open fire. Let the cameras roll.

      “Mr. Baghdadi, do you regret your murderous rampages now that ‘the heat is on’ so to speak?” the perky blonde reporter chirped.


      “”Would that be a ‘yes’, Mr. Baghdadi?” The perky blonde leaned in closer.

      “Grrrrr……! Argh! Argh! Spluffrnaht! Nyah! Nyah! Oh-Ah-ah-ah-oh…….arghhhhh!”

      “Mr. Baghadi, I’m afraid neither I nor my listeners speak gibberish, so stop kidding around and let’s get serious, shall we? What’s that yummy smell? Anyway, where was I? Oh yes! Mr. Baghdadi, do you think you would have done anything differently had you known you would end up getting roasted for real on Good Morning America? Mr. Baghdadi? Mr. Baghdadi? Stop playing your little games with me, Mr. Baghdadi……..”

  • Jay Currie

    It is interesting to speculate whether a prolonged Syrian/opposition/ISIS/Hezbollah/Iran war is a good or a bad thing. Bad for the innocent civilians obviously. But potentially good as it may serve to thin the leadership ranks in all those entities.

    • Justin St.Denis

      Agreed. These people have been going at one another hammer-and-tongs for almost a millennium. Given that, I would suggest we stop supporting anyone with money, arms or anything. Let them do it all with hammers and tongs. Much more medieval and therefore much more appropriate. Also, cut satellite service to those people. They really do not need to worry about cell phone or Internet bills on top of everything else they have to deal with at the moment. Plus, isn’t it “cultural appropriation” – and thus racist – on the part of ANY Middle-Eastern nation to use such technology? We must save these people from modernity and switch off their lights, too. And their oil wells. Their electrical grids. Anything and everything “colonial” in the Middle-East must be surgically removed, and that means ANYTHING that can be described as “modern”.

      Then airdrop in cases of hammers and more cases of tongs.

  • Hard Little Machine

    They’re not using enough hydrogen bombs.