It is definitely not ‘benevolent sexism’ to keep the door open for good manners

Call me old-fashioned, a latter-day Galahad, but I still open doors for women, with a smile…

…This marks me down as sexist, according to Professor Judith Hall, of North-Eastern University in Boston, USA, who conducted research into male behaviour towards women.

Apparently there are two kinds of sexism: there is the nasty sort; the groping, wolf-whistling, topless calendar-admiring kind, which is hostile sexism.

And then there is “benevolent sexism”, which involves all the sorts of behaviour to which I’ve already pleaded guilty…

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  • Drunk_by_Noon

    This is what I do to get around this problem.
    I hold the door open as my mother taught me how to do for ladies, and if the woman complains, I punch her in the face as hard as I would a man that was being a douchebag.
    I think this is the best way.

    • Guest

      My approach is less straightforward. If they (women) don’t have grey hair and don’t look foreign, I generally assume they’re horrible cunts and try to have as little to do with them as possible (including letting doors slam on them). This minimizes problems while leading to the occasional pleasant surprise.

      • Blacksmith

        Nice, I got a good mental picture of a leftist broad knocked on her ass by a door.

        • Guest

          Mission accomplished.

          • Blacksmith

            Just for your edification, she was blonde with her hair pulled back in a bun so tight her eyes were slanted wearing a pantsuit, in beige.

      • Frances

        But my grey hairs are not that obvious. Hold the door open. I guarantee that my daughters, at least, will be appreciatiive. So will I.

    • Xavier

      I go for the more subtle, “Oh sorry, I didn’t notice you were a man – the mustache should have tipped me off.”

      • Frau Katze

        Good one!

  • DaninVan

    Good one, D. by N.!!

    I hold the door open for ANYONE coming or going. Only once has an ignorant bitch reprimanded me like I was her personal whipping boy; I should have let the door go in her #$%^&@! face.

    • Drunk_by_Noon

      Judith Hall is just a male-hating lesbian.

      Smiling at a woman is sexist too.
      http://www.science20.com/news_articles/can_you_detect_sexism_in_a_smile-153876
      “If you do not show favoritism toward a woman, because you do not want to date her or be friends, that is hostile sexism.”
      “If you were friendly, you were benevolently sexist.”

      • Exile1981

        Feminists like to set up no win scenarios so no matter the outcome they still get to be a victim.

    • occupant 9

      Same, I hold the door open for anyone too, except of late, I’ve declined to hold it open for a hijab gal, since her hijab is the “flag of Islam” telling me I’m filth in my own land and the women folk enjoying freedom are sluts.

      Holding the door open is a sign of respect and so I use it to give it or decline it.

    • Blacksmith

      I always hold the door and smile and 99% of the time I get a note of appreciation either a smile a nod or more often a thank you. The few times I get the riot act I laugh and make a comment about how it must be a bitch to be so miserable in life.

      • Surele Surele

        I’m definitely steeling this.

  • tom_billesley

    Is it benevolent sexism to leave the seat down?

    • Blacksmith

      Who knows…..

      • Clausewitz

        Ba da bing……… Rimshot..

    • Frau Katze

      Unclear.

  • Blacksmith

    Damn I didn’t know I was also a benevolent sexist, I am a racist (cause I am white), an islamophobe cause I think they need eradication, and now because I was taught to be courteous to women I am also a benevolent sexist.

  • Raymond Hietapakka

    [[[

  • J. C.

    Outside of professional interactions, I stay as far away from women as I can…

    • Frau Katze

      We aren’t all crazy.

      • AlanUK

        Trouble is, it doesn’t take too many crazies to put some of us mere males off.
        Shy creatures, we are

    • Frances

      Oh, man, you are missing something. We are’t all feminist harridans. In reality, you are missing so much by refusing to interact with so many of us.

    • J. C.

      Of course not all women are ‘bad’, but the risks associated with relationships nowadays (legal & financial) are just too great to take that chance, IMO… Also, I can’t remember the last time I met a women who didn’t bore/annoy me after a short period of time (most men do as well, but I don’t want to sleep with them, haha!). Plus, I once read the CDC’s 2012 stats for STD infection rates and it significantly raised my level of averseness to the idea of… Umm… ‘Coupling’.

      But I’m an introvert by nature, so I don’t mind too much… 😉

  • AlanUK

    I judge whether or not letting go of the door risks causing harm or inconvenience to the person next through the door. If it won’t, I let it go.
    If it would, or might, I hold the door open, regardless of age or apparent sex. It’s a matter of courtesy and concern for the other person. I was taught this by my parents when I was 5 or thereabouts. I’ve been doing it for 65 or so years and I don’t intend to change.
    I can’t remember when (or if) anyone has ever objected. I commonly get a thank you or a nod which I take to be equivalent in a fast-moving world. I intend to carry on doing it until I am so mentally or physically incapacitated as to make it possible.
    If anyone doesn’t like it they will just have to put up with it. Do they really want a door slammed in their face?

    • Alain

      Same for me, and I might add that I have also had others, usually younger and both male and female, hold the door open for me. I always smile and say thank you. That occurs when I have my hands full carrying something, but it is always appreciated. Only once when I held the door open for a woman and not in the least pretty, did she march through the open door screaming I was sexist. I was much younger then and was speakless. Now I would have something to say.

  • Norman_In_New_York

    I hope Prof. Hall’s vibrator short circuits while she is using it.

  • Surele Surele
  • Surele Surele

    Why nobody ever wolf whistles at me anymore? That’s what I want to know.