I was recruited by the thought police

Political correctness on campus has reached the level of crazy, and for using that word I am a bigot

In the liberal ghetto of Ann Arbor, several University of Michigan administrators recently gathered for a passionate brainstorm. The head of student affairs declared he was simply “going to die” if he heard about one more so-called micro-aggression on campus. When a colleague told him he was “acting crazy” for being so sensitive, he was shipped off to a mandatory session for freshmen where he learned about white privilege and determined that he would never say anything potentially controversial again. And with that, the Inclusive Language Campaign was born.

Under this new initiative, which is all the rage at Michigan and some other universities, the quoted words used in the above paragraph are considered offensive. In addition to posters plastered around campus urging us to “Stop. Think.” before we speak, my peers and I have been encouraged to sign an ambiguously written Inclusive Language Campaign pledge. We’re all being drafted as thought police, charged with regulating the speech of our peers.