Burak Bekdil: Muslims discovered Mercedes!

Mehmet Görmez, the head of Turkey’s Religious Affairs Directorate (Diyanet), will soon start using the Mercedes S500 sedan, which is worth 1 million Turkish Liras ($435,000)

Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan argues that the American continent was discovered by Muslim sailors some 300 years before Christopher Columbus – and that Muslims had even built a mosque atop a hill near the Cuban shore.

Science and Technology (Science!) Minister Fikri Işık claims that Muslim scientists working around 1,200 years ago (some 700-800 years before Galileo Galilei) were the first to determine that the Earth is a sphere.

These are all controversial theories.

But the luxury car Mercedes is discovered by Muslims every day, most recently by the top Turkish clergy.

Professor Mehmet Görmez, the president of the Religious Affairs Directorate (Diyanet), is the inventor of the theory that Christians should celebrate when Muslims (Ottomans) capture Christian lands, as this is a merry event and they are lucky because their hearts and minds will be “conquered” by Islam.

All the same, when non-Muslims take back the lands they lost to Muslims this amounts to the sinful act of “occupation.” According to this theory, Professor Görmez should be feeling sorry for the Viennese, because in 1683 they lost the chance of pure happiness of having their minds and hearts conquered…

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  • simus1

    Nice to see the Sultan’s clowns are making do with the best at public expense.
    Brings to mind the famous quote by Talleyrand about the Bourbon restoration:
    “They have learned nothing and forgotten nothing.”

    Or perhaps it’s just brain parasites and prolonged inbreeding doing their thing.

    • Rosenmops

      brain parasites

      I hadn’t thought of that. There certainly seems to be something wrong with their brains!

    • Exile1981

      I vote syphilis as the cause, it gets into the brain in later stages.

  • Ed

    In 1000 years Muslims will discover the wheel

    • Rosenmops

      You’re an optimist!

  • Mickey Oberman

    A scientific observation and question.
    Whenever Islam takes over another state, even another Islamic state, the honest have nothings of the conquering state suddenly acquire wealth – Mercedes S500 kind of wealth.
    Is this some naturally occurring phenomenon like – Global Warming?
    Or does business in their butcher shops and souvenir shops and barber shops etc. suddenly multiply exponentially?

    • winniec

      May I suggest this: Islam is theocratic fascism. Graft is rampant in Islamic countries because theocratic power is abused. As a result, many entrepreneurs in Islamic countries just give up after being extorted by the rulers time after time. In addition, the pervasive fatalism of Islamic theology leads to improvidential habits.
      And yes, Islam causes global warming because Muslim eat three times more meat than other groups. This depletes the green cover of the earth and the flatulence of the billions of animals depletes the ozone.
      Islam is based on slavery. Exploitation of ‘others’ is normative. Slavery exists in the Islamic paradise.

  • winniec

    How dare the disbelievers resist our CONQUEST!

    • They believe that everything that Islam ever touched is forever theirs. (That’s why they’re so keen on asserting that they discovered America and Australia etc. It’s not just nutty boasting. It’s a claim of ownership.)

      Here’s a piece about the Cordoba Cathedral, which was previously a Mosque, previous to that a Christian Church, and previous to that a pagan temple of some sort. As usual, don’t bother with the article, just check out the comments. I’ve said in the past, Arab News is very good with dissenting comments. But they didn’t publish one of mine on this thread. Here it is (in response to “Abdul”): “We want Constantinople back! End the occupation!” In my experience pointing out that Istanbul was Constantinople sends Muslims hydrophobic.

      A lot of them genuinely see Spain as conquered, Islamic, unjustifiably occupied territory.

      http://www.arabnews.com/world/news/674766

      Since I’m going on, check out Abdul here: “No, it was never a Church in the beginning; its unsubstantiated claim. Just some stones and cement…..check the history.” Of course it was a Church, that’s perfectly well documented. But Muslims tend to assert what they want to believe and then assume that the facts necessarily support them. It’s a very pre-modern mindset.

      • Frau Katze

        Just like saying the Temple Mount never had a temple.

        • Do they say that?

          • Frau Katze

            Many do. They contradict themselves. First they all the Jews are from Europe, then started bringing up ancient Old Testament stuff saying Jews stole gold in ancient Egypt. Now they want it back.

            So they must have been in the ME in ancient times. Then they turn around say, you’re all from Europe, go back there.

          • Yes, I’ve noticed that this idiotic “Khazar” theory has a lot of traction with anti-semites and Muslims (but I repeat…). This nutty idea, which has AFAIK precisely zero genetic evidence backing it up, was only invented in the mid 19th century, and is famous because Arthur Koestler promoted it in his increasingly eccentric dotage.

            (BTW, have you ever read Koestler’s autobiography? Two long volumes, but absolutely worth it.)

            Just like saying the Temple Mount never had a temple.

            So I suppose the Wailing Wall constitutes the remains of a 6th C. BC Mosque?

          • Frau Katze

            I didn’t know that about Koestler. I don’t know much him period.

          • He’s worth a look . Darkness at Noon is as significant as 1984, IMNVHO.