Richard The III Found – Very Thin, Oppressed By Social Workers

“Human remains found buried beneath a social services car park in Leicester are those of Richard III, scientists confirmed today.

In an extraordinary discovery which rewrites the history books, the skeleton was identified by DNA analysis after researchers traced one of the king’s descendants”.

It is rumoured he has asked not to be moved as he wishes not to lose his place in line, given he hasn’t received his first disability benefits cheque yet.