Apocalypse meow: ISIS issues a fatwa on cat breeders

Hello Crusader Kitty Will Deal With ISIS shortly.

Hello Crusader Kitty Will Deal With ISIS shortly.

Jihadi fighters are hunting down kittens in the Iraqi city of Mosul after a fatwa on cat-breeders was issued by senior ISIS clerics.

The new law forbids the indoor breeding of cats inside the Islamic State’s ‘caliphate’ and claims to be in line with the jihadists’ “vision, ideology and beliefs”.

  • vimy

    Hello. I want one of those patches

  • V10_Rob

    Good news, everyone! The caliphate’s rat population is set to explode!

    First dogs, now cats…

    • GrimmCreeper

      The caliphate is the rat population!

    • ntt1

      rats will become halal

    • EarlyBird

      May those rats go forth and multiply and spread black plague and cholera to those inbred swines. If they want a 7th century setting. they’ll get the full measure of it. Forward, rodents!

  • CaligulaJones

    Well, they’ve done it now. The SJWs at PETA are gonna go ballistic…

  • ontario john

    Now they have gone too far! Nuke the F***ing bastards!

  • Justin St.Denis

    I shared this news with my alpha male feline as I set down his dish of poached salmon. He said: “I are really pissed at ISIS right now. Want scratch balls off jihadis lotsa lotsa times now. I are really, really pissed! Got more salmon? Hmmmmm…?”

  • Clausewitz

    If the Jihadists were any crazier they’d be Democrats.

  • Does ISIS know that Mohammad was a cat person?

    • FactsWillOut

      I thought he was strictly a goat guy.

      • Yes and no.

        But seriously, I read in a fact book that he liked cats.

        • FactsWillOut

          Sauté or Fricasse?

  • Hard Little Machine
  • FactsWillOut

    Bastet is not impressed.
    May they drink camel piss and may their sons be sodomized and their women stoned to death. Oh wait…

    • They enjoy that shit.

      • FactsWillOut

        I forgot “May their daughters have acid thrown in their faces”, but they’re into that, too.

  • marty_p

    So let me get this straight:
    Dog breeders Bad
    Cat breeders Bad
    Goat F*kers OK.

    Makes sense in the Bizzaro world of Mo’s.

  • xavier

    But but but Mohammed liked cats and never dreamed up his stupid prohibition against dogs.

    Well no surprised when you’receive completely unanchored in reality fussing over shit that doesn’t matter becomes utterly cosmogical.

    It very telling how this parallels the Nazis death squads.at the time the regime was on its death throes the Nazis diverted huge amount of resources to annihilate the Jews.

    Totalitarianism hate life and its joys

  • Shebel

    The Muzzies want to establish a Caliphate

    — not a Catiphate .

  • lzzrd

    Bad news, Just got a call from the company that sells the patch. They do not have any more and will not be getting any more…..As we say down here….bummer…:0(..