Two knifemen, described as ‘of Middle Eastern appearance’, attempt to abduct a serviceman outside RAF Marham in Norfolk. Police immediately issue a statement saying that there is nothing to suggest the incident is ‘terrorism-related’.
So that’s all right, then.
I suppose it could always have been a last day at school dare by students at a nearby sixth-form college. Typically, these end-of-term high jinks involve stealing a policeman’s helmet or a traffic cone and sticking it on top of an equestrian statue in the market square.
Maybe this year they decided to up the ante and behead a squaddie, so they could impale his head on a pole outside the Corn Exchange and post the pictures on their Facebook account.