Scientists Call For Earth To Be Made Metrosexual Laughing Stock Of Universe

I hope aliens laugh at Social Justice Warriors like we do.

Then again they may just roll their multiple eyes and turn up the death ray to extra crispy in response to the crap sent their way.

Send aliens modern messages of Earth’s equality and diversity, say scientists

The plaque on Pioneer 10 has been deemed sexist as the male was not a metrosexual…




  • Petey the First

    No. We need to show them the absolute depravity of humans in war and end the presentation with a human smiling, showing lots of teeth. So when one of their species ever asks, “Are they good to eat?” the answer is always “NO!” (Louis Wu).

  • dance…dancetotheradio

    The aliens already know too much.

    • Justin St.Denis

      I for one welcome our new reptilian overlords. They are better looking than both Justin Trudeau and Tommy ‘Two Passports’ Mulcair, who likely has fecal matter in his beard.

  • Let’s assume for the moment that aliens do exist and are interested in Earth. How long will that last when they see how stupid people are?

    • We are bugs.

      • dance…dancetotheradio

        Shaddapa you Suzuki.

      • Intergalactic bugs.

      • Justin St.Denis

        Perhaps, but I suspect we are bigger, more intelligent bugs than exist on other planets.

        I don’t “buy into” any of that Third Phase of the Moon bullshit about cities on Mars, the Moon, Jupiter or Saturn’s rings. Or aliens.

        People watch way too much bad fucking television.

        • Man_with_Hat

          And bad sci fi movies! I agree that we are it and there are no extra-terrestrials. Some (the left), want them to come like tourists, peacefully and leave us with something (money, knowledge) and be on their way, all kumbaya. They (left again) are also the ones who turn everything upside down and portray them as hideous barbaric monsters in Hollyweird. Jewish and Christian prophecy says knowledge will increase and we will inhabit the universe. The irony in the here and now is the if they (you got it the left) support Islam for the win because they hate us so much, they may get their portrayal (and death) as we terrorize our way across the universe, whereas if they support us, they may get peace.

  • The Butterfly

    I wonder how many women actually worked on Pioneer 10. Any guesses?

    • That’s mean!

      • Petey the First

        And critical. We all know how women scientists react to criticism.

        • Justin St.Denis

          Yes, they allegedly cry, require comforting which leads to sex and then more new scientists.

          • Petey the First

            Lol. That’s actually a very good point. 😉

  • Icebow

    ‘Take us to your President Trump.’

  • andycanuck

    How do you breathe through that thing?
    /elephant aliens

  • Frances

    What do they propose – a picture of Jenner before and after?

  • Grover the Polar Bear

    Please stop trying to contact aliens. If they come here and see how screwed up our societies are, they’ll blast us into smithereens to prevent us from infecting the galaxy with our bullshit. Maybe they’ll leave the plankton and the butterflies. Plankton and butterflies aren’t so bad.

  • Dana Garcia

    I’m more bothered by the fact that a Voyager greeting was spoken by Kurt Waldheim, the Secretary General of the UN at the time, who previously had a sketchy career as a Nazi in the Wehrmacht.

    • Petey the First

      It just demonstrates human agility – don’t fuck with us.

  • mauser 98

    send photos , speeches of Premier Strapon .. aliens high tail it like deer

  • Cat-astrophe

    If a message was sent out with all our gender bender notions, any alien who found the message would be scared shiite-less.

  • David

    ta da

    • Justin St.Denis

      Not in my house!*

      *advantages of an Asian-raised wife

  • Justin St.Denis

    Wow, that male figure has a genuinely tiny cock. Either that, or I am hung like an intergalactic overlord!

    • Petey the First

      Asian. 🙂